The inexplicable...
HOME PAGE
I'm confused? What does it all mean?
What has been achieved so far?
Where next?
What can I do to help?
What's the latest news?
The LARS=SEX GOD Fan Club Page
The LARS=SEX GOD Merchandising
Welcome to the original and official LARS=SEX GOD home page. This
represents the base of our global efforts to have our rather unique brand name
recognised by the ignorant masses. That's right, having started from humble
beginnings at Mitchell campus of Charles Sturt University, Australia, we now
have every intention of going all the way.
I'm confused - what does it all mean?
You're confused? Excellent! In a way, the LARS=SEX GOD phenomenon has
already affected you. We offer no explanation because it would spoil the fun.
Don't you remember being a kid at school where the "in"-crowd people had lots of
in-jokes that none of us mortals ever really understood? Now you're an adult,
it's time for revenge. This time, we are the "in"-crowd and those you hear
asking "what the hell are they going on about?" serve to symbolise our success.
What has been achieved so far?
Not as much as we'd like. In a way, we have been in training for the major
breakthrough.
First, we started with simple graffiti. No, we didn't go stomping across
railroad tracks with spray cans. We started small, scribbling it feverishly on
lecture theatre desks. One of our dedicated group bragged that if it wasn't
on the desk you were sitting at, it was on the one beside you. You can just
picture him sitting down for a class, checking the desk, and then getting up
to find a "virgin" desktop.
Then came experimentation with other mediums: email. One of our group logged
on to the university computer system and spammed all the users with our simple
message. A rush of imitators ensued, and access to the guest account was
promptly disabled.
The next medium was the student newspaper. Another of our group tried sneaking
in a small "LARS=SEX GOD" proclamation at the end of his article only to find
that the sub-editor preferred it as the prominent headline. As has come to be
the case with LARS=SEX GOD, it is often best to not ask why...
Each year, Charles Sturt University has an awards ceremony for the
Theatre/Media students, known as the "Lens Awards". The posters advertising
the event were soon doctored by students with liquid paper and black texta.
Some were promptly souvenired by fellow LARS=SEX GOD afficionados...
At this point, the LARS=SEX GOD movement was starting to feel a little cocky.
What next? The national press? TV? Clothing?
We started with clothing. More specifically, black corduroy hats. At a time of
year when the student population was hard up for cash, we quickly sold 29 of
these collector's items without the benefits of advertising.
Clearly, we were gaining an appreciation of what we could achieve with a
little effort. Education, and thus confusion, of the masses became our goal.
Two of our kind became so caught up in it they felt it necessary to purchase
boxes of chalk and creep around campus at 2am writing it wherever possible.
They were heartily congratulated the following day.
The following year saw the phenomenon continue in much the same vein. Our band
of scribes continued their excellent work, and the year concluded with more
merchandise: the LARS=SEX GOD t-shirt. The die-hards constituted most of our
customers, but we noticed a new and worrying trend: people were forking out
money for a shirt whilst asking "who is Lars?". We began to realise just how
intriguing our little joke was to the rest of the student population.
LARS=SEX GOD is a movement, in some ways akin to a religion. In the simple
absurdity of it, the devout followers find a new strength. How else do you
explain the theft of the otherwise worthless and harmless t-shirt advertising
material?
Where next?
As those who spent much of their their time at University move on into the
real world, the LARS=SEX GOD movement has fallen into a kind of limbo. It is
only through sites such as this that we have been able to continue spreading
the word in some cohesive form.
However, it has become clear that we need to regroup and clarify what exactly
the movement stands for and where it will go from here. We need a new focus.
We need direction.
That direction has been decided. The movement will proceed on as a form of
anti-brand name. We're sick and tired of seeing the Nike or McDonald's logos
wherever we look, so it's time we struck back. We need to reach out and claim
a brand name of our own, where dedication to it does not make a bunch of guys
in suits very rich. LARS=SEX GOD is the brand name of the people, and deserves
to be advertised just as widely as those which pretend to contribute to our
global community. LARS=SEX GOD takes nothing, and in return offers us a
wonderfully absurd tool for laughing at the hyperbole that surrounds us.
It is our one finger salute to the world at large.
What can I do to help?
Your job is simple: spread the word. Proclaim it out loud. Tell the world.
We want it to be known the world over. Understanding is not our goal - there
is little to understand here. Let us celebrate that and take it forth
regardless. We want to hear the world cry "...but I don't get it!" Only then
can we feel we have accomplished something.
The form of spreading the word is left to your imagination. You can start with
the basics, like simply throwing the phrase into conversations completely at
random. Alternatively, tell someone all about these web pages. We don't care
what you say about them: as long as you get the phrase LARS=SEX GOD embedded
in their brain somewhere, we will count it a success.
Here are some things that others have done:
- Written it in wet cement
- Worn the t-shirt to their local church
- Appeared in the Australian national press wearing the hat
- Indiscriminate and miscellaneous writing of LARS=SEX GOD
- Created links from their Web pages to this one - you can steal the small
logo at the bottom of this page to use if you like.
- Shown the t-shirt and hat to their workmates
Clearly, we don't expect you to start by sponsoring a large billboard at a
major international sporting event (although we don't disapprove of that). In
this movement, every small contribution is considered a success. All we ask is
that you follow a few simple guidelines.
What's the latest news?
updated 29 April 2002
Due to the efforts of Mark Brindley, you can now purchase L=SG merchandise
again over at the Cafepress website.
Because these items are custom-manufactured for each order, the prices (in $US)
are a little more inflated than we would like but we don't have a lot of choice
about that.
LARS=SEX GOD made an unexpected appearance in Australian Personal Computer
magazine (Dec 2000 issue). Here's a photo of page 100.
How did that happen? A longtime supporter of the project just happens
to work for the magazine and in one of his online columns he made an
attempt to
explain it all
(albeit with a few minor factual errors). For reasons unknown to him, the designer
of this promotional advertisement then latched onto it.
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE
Site feedback: david@lovetown.net
Back to David's home page
